What to Expect in Your First Online Therapy Appointment

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Okay so you’re into it and ready to try out online therapy. Now you’re realizing you have a few questions bubbling up, which is perfectly normal! One you may be asking yourself is “what will my first counseling session be like?” I’m here to shed some light on this and hopefully answer most of the questions you may be having! 

Let’s imagine you have found a therapist in Connecticut or northern Virginia who you are excited to work with. You seem to be a great fit, and you’re looking forward to diving in! You’ve filled out any pre-session paperwork that they need. It’s time to log on and check in. First sessions are great because they serve as an orientation of sorts to therapy! You will get to go over the ins and outs of your therapist’s practice information and policies. And of course, you will get to go into some more detail about what’s going on with you, what brings you to therapy, and share your hopes and goals with your therapist.

Here are a few items that will likely come up during your first online session. Keep in mind every therapist will have a different flow, and in some cases these topics may take up more than one session! Be patient and trust the process :)  

  1. Confirmation of your identity.

    Since this is likely the first time you are meeting your therapist, they will want to make sure you are who you say you are! Some therapists will ask to see your driver’s license or another way of confirming your identity. I have my clients upload their ID to the secure patient portal. After verifying your identity, this will likely not need to be done the same way every week. 

  2. Confirmation of your current location.

    This will be a weekly check-in. As psychotherapists, we need to make sure we know where you are in case you need help. If you have a medical or mental health emergency during the session, having your current address makes it possible for us to get you the help you need as fast as possible.  

  3. Talk about the backup plan if technology fails.

    Oh, technology. We have all had times when technology has left us high and dry! But don’t worry - your therapist should have a backup plan in place, and make sure you are familiar with it. If you’re reading this during the COVID-19 pandemic, you are probably aware that there is an unprecedented number of therapists, doctors, and other health providers doing their work through video in order to respect social distancing recommendations. This can mean that there are a lot of people using the servers, and can sometimes result in less than perfect tech conditions - pixelated video, cutting of audio, freezing. Fortunately, companies have been rising to the occasion and video quality has still been extremely high in my sessions. Regardless, I have backup plans in place for the off chance that we have video issues. Tech stuff comes with the territory, but it’s easy to roll with the punches when you have a backup plan! 

  4. Go over emergency contacts.

    Your therapist may verify your emergency contacts and what they may be contacted for. If you have a medical or mental health emergency, it’s super important that your therapist has up to date contact information for at least one emergency contact. This is important regardless, but especially if your therapist is not in the same area as you. 

  5. Go over confidentiality and consent forms.

    Confidentiality is a big thing in therapy. Your therapist will talk with you about confidentiality, what it means, and what they are mandated to report. Your therapist probably will have you fill out consent documents either digitally or through snail mail. As you go over the policies, ask any and all questions you have, and make sure you understand the practice policies, privacy policies, cancellation policies, etc. 

  6. Talk about financials.

    Whether you are choosing self-pay or using your insurance, it’s important to lay it all out regarding the processes and expectations for payment. Your therapist will likely go over their system for collecting payment. For example, do they allow using credit cards, and if so how that is done, or how they will collect any copays or coinsurance your plan may have.

  7. Dive into what brings you to therapy.

    This will be the time when you and your therapist go over the history of what brings you to therapy: when it started, how long it’s been going on, any patterns, important experiences, family dynamics, and more. Your therapist may ask about your strengths and the things you enjoy. The first few sessions consist of a fair amount of information gathering so that your therapist can have a baseline understanding as you two develop your goals for yourself. This is the start of you and your therapist getting a feel for one another, and start building a therapeutic working relationship.

  8. Your goals for therapy.

    You have decided to start therapy because you have goals and ideas of how you would like to grow and change. Share these goals with your therapist! Your therapist will want to take part in this vision and help you get there. It will be so helpful to the process if you and your therapist both have an idea of what you’d like to see improve and how to know if therapy is working!

  9. Your strengths!

    Some people have the assumption that therapy is a lot of talking about problems. But therapists like myself want to also hear what you do well! What do you love about yourself? What are some ways you knock it out of the park? What are some things about yourself that you are proud of? No matter how small, noticing these strengths are an important part of therapy!

  10. Special considerations for online therapy.

    This is the time you and your therapist can discuss how to make sure your session is private, for example by finding a quiet room to yourself while using headphones and placing a speaker playing music or white noise by the door. You may strategize how to create for yourself a cozy and comfortable therapeutic space in your own home. You may also discuss how to help ensure a good quality internet connection, by restarting your computer, closing any background apps such as Skype, and making sure no one in the home is streaming Netflix or playing MMO games while you’re in session. 

  11. Set up your ongoing appointment time.

    If you and your therapist haven’t set a regularly scheduled time yet, you likely will in your first session. Many therapists suggest having a regularly scheduled weekly appointment so that the same day and time every week you know you have an hour reserved just for yourself and your growth. A predictable schedule can be great for you and for your therapist. 

As you chat with your therapist about the above and more, feel free to express any questions or concerns you carry, as well as any expectations you have for psychotherapy. How do you envision therapy going? What do you assume will occur during a session? Your therapist will want to know these things so that you can collaborate on how therapy will go going forward. 

Here’s a bonus tip: after your first session, if any questions or concerns popup, be sure to write them down so you can bring them up in your next session! Your therapist wants to answer any questions you have and make sure you feel comfortable. 

I hope this helps you as you prepare for your first online telehealth therapy session! If you still need help finding a therapist in Connecticut or Virginia, feel free to call me at 860-384-7626 for a free 15-minute phone consultation, or schedule it online here. I’d be happy to help you find the right person to work with. If you are looking for help with anxiety, boosting self-esteem, people-pleasing, or perfectionism, you can read more about how I can help here.

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If you’re struggling with all of the changes happening related to the current COVID-19 pandemic, or if you have other personal goals that you are trying to get a handle on, know that you are not alone. This is a challenging time for everyone, with so much uncertainty. If you are feeling especially overwhelmed, anxious, or vigilant, remember you can reach out to a therapist trained in anxiety or trauma to support you! We are here for you. 

If you’d like to work with me, set up a free 15-minute phone or video consultation by contacting me here or call me at 860-384-7626. Let’s chat!

Brittany Hankard, LMFT is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist serving Connecticut and Virginia. Brittany owns an online private practice called Vibrant Solutions LLC. Brittany loves to help smart, driven, people-pleasing women move from self-doubt and perfectionism to confidence and clarity about their lives. If you are interested in working with her, click here to set up a consult or call 860-384-7626.